Sunday, 20 August 2017

Top Man

With Brucey off to a better place, the BBC offers us some insight into the great man's career:
Sir Bruce Forsyth, who has died at the age of 89, hosted some of the biggest shows on British TV of the past 60 years - from Sunday Night at the London Palladium to Strictly Come Dancing.
As well as the prime time game shows for which he was best known, there were many other sides to his long career, from movies to a TV sitcom and attempts to crack America.

He made his TV debut before World War Two

Sir Bruce is the only entertainer whose career spanned the entire TV era.
He made his first appearance at the age of 11 on Come and Be Televised in 1939, just three years after regular BBC TV broadcasts began.
He performed a song and tap dance routine and was interviewed by the programme's host Jasmine Bligh, who asked what his ambition was.
He replied: "I want to become a star and buy my mum a fur coat."
Days later, BBC TV was suspended because of the outbreak of war.
Bruce turned professional three years later and his first advert in trade paper The Stage read: "Bruce Forsyth: available for anything."

He nearly quit showbiz before his big break arrived

But he didn't find stardom until the age of 30, when he was chosen to host Sunday Night at the London Palladium on ITV.
Before that, he was a jobbing performer on the variety circuit.
"I gave myself five years and I thought, if I don't do any good in five years, I don't want to end up being a frustrated performer [so] I'll get out of the business," he said.
"And the five years were nearly up, and I got the job at the Palladium."

He got rave reviews in a West End musical

After finding fame, he made his West End musical debut in 1964 in a show called Little Me, about fictional Hollywood diva Belle Poitrine.
The show had come from Broadway, and Bruce played her various male patrons.
The Times' drama critic described him as "omni-competent" and concluded that "the honours of the evening go to the multiple performance of Bruce Forsyth as a senile slum landlord, thick-spectacled doughboy, leather-jacketed German film director, and egregiously patrician lover of Miss Poitrine's dreams".

He starred in an Oscar-nominated film

That musical led him to the movies, with a role in Star!, the 1968 biopic of British actress Gertrude Lawrence, played by Julie Andrews.
Sir Bruce played her tough vaudevillian father, and the film was nominated for seven Oscars - although none were for Sir Bruce's acting.
He later said he wished he had done more acting.
"I'd like to have done more of that, but in Britain we tend to pigeonhole people.
"In Britain I'm really known as the game show [host]. That's the pigeonhole they've put me in, and that's where I'm stuck."
He also appeared in Bedknobs and Broomsticks in 1971.
But he missed out on a role that could have really launched his film career - Fagin in the 1968 filmed version of Oliver!

He had a dodgy pop career

Brucie released a string of singles in the 1960s and '70s, although none made it to the charts.
Some were novelty songs related to his TV career - like 1959's I'm In Charge, named after his Sunday Night at the London Palladium catchphrase.
There were other jolly pop songs, and in 1968 he sung the odd patriotic ditty I'm Backing Britain, the anthem of a campaign to boost the economy by urging workers to work an extra half an hour a day for free.
And he appeared on Top of the Pops in 1975 performing Barry Manilow's Sandra, with lyrics that now sound horribly sexist, beginning: "She's a great little housewife/Though sometimes she talks like a fool."

He tried to break America

He was eager to replicate his British success across the Atlantic.
In 1979, he took his one-man show to Broadway, which he described as "a dream come true".
But he was angered when the British press seized on the negative reviews and described it as "the most controversial episode of my professional career".
Seven years later, he returned to the US with an ABC game show called Bruce Forsyth's Hot Streak.
A YouTube clip shows the enthusiastic American crowd greeting him with chants of "Bruce! Bruce! Bruce!"
Despite that, and despite him showing his usual warmth and repartee, he didn't quite translate to a US audience and the show didn't last beyond its initial three-month run.
He would have tried again to break the States - but his priorities lay with his family.
"I'd liked to have made it in America very much indeed, but it wasn't to be and I think I would have gone back there again and kept going on having a go for America," he said.
"Because I think with me being the all-round entertainer I could have stood a good chance.
"But at that time of making a decision, I met my darling wife Wilnelia and it sort of changed my attitude towards my life in general."

He had his own sitcom

Sir Bruce left game shows behind for a while to star in a Thames TV sitcom in 1986 and 87.
He played officious, overbearing supermarket manager Cecil Slinger in Slinger's Day - a sequel to Tripper's Day, which ended when its star Leonard Rossiter died in 1984.
Sir Bruce's attempt at scripted TV comedy can be found on YouTube.

Have I Got News For You revived his career

As the new millennium dawned, it seemed that his career was fading.
Play Your Cards Right had been axed by ITV - leading Brucie to have a rare fit of public anger, saying the channel's controller David Liddiment had "embarrassed me, humiliated me, and shown me no respect whatsoever".
But a few years later, he was watching Have I Got News for You - which uses guest hosts - when Wilnelia turned to him and said: "You could do that show."
He replied: "I was just thinking the same thing, darling."
So he phoned team captain Paul Merton, who put his name forward to the producers.
That appearance, which included a memorable round of Play Your Iraqi Cards Right, reminded the nation of the Brucie magic and directly led to his booking for Strictly Come Dancing, which launched the following year.
If it had ever been in doubt, his status as a national treasure was assured.

News Thump

Stephen Hawking has been advised not to raise concerns about the NHS as the Conservative party won’t listen to any who can’t stroll around pompously like one of them.

The world famous scientist, who is arguably one of the most intelligent individuals on the planet, delivered a talk in Cambridge today in which he voiced grave concerns over the increasing privatisation of the NHS, and warned that the Conservatives could destroy the great institution altogether if not careful.

Former Conservative party advisor Simon Williams, who saw sense and deserted the far-right party several years ago told reporters in Cambridge “Professor Hawking has excelled himself again with this damning attack on Tory healthcare policy.

“He gave the issue of privatisation the full benefit of his great mind and wisdom, and has sent a stark warning to Jeremy Hunt.”

Shaking his head slightly he added, “Sadly, this will of course fall on deaf ears, as the Tories won’t listen to anyone not capable of prancing like a prick into the Bullingdon club or leaping onto a horse to chase a fox down and see it ripped to shreds.

“Perhaps they would listen if he could join Cabinet for a quick run around a wheat field, but this is out of the question

“And whenever a wheelchair user speaks to the Conservatives in person, well, they may as well be invisible.”

He added, “I just hope there are no repercussions for the professor – it wouldn’t surprise me if they take his electric wheelchair and his fancy computer off him for this.”


Well Said

A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world.
Edmond de Goncourt
French artist & novelist (1822 - 1896) 

Just in Time for Christmas

I have no idea why these books have been published, as I cannot understand how this is in any way beneficial to kids.  That said, it makes for a good piece in Grumpy Sloth, where they also show the book covers.  They may even show in here, if you're lucky.

Children’s books are supposed to be uplifting stories that teach children valuable life lessons that will hopefully stick with them for the rest of their life.
These are not those books.
1. “Go the Fuck to Sleep”
Subtlety is not this author’s forte.
2. “Harpo’s Horrible Secret”
Something tells me it’s got something to do with Grandpa standing uncomfortably close.
3. “Where Willy Went…”
For parents who don’t believe in lying to their kids about the stork.
4. “The Night Dad Went To Jail”
This is just… Why?
5. “My First Cavity Search”
This makes me uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons.
6. “Why Is Mommy Moaning?”
The fact that it’s a “’First Time” book is probably not helping the awkward factor.
7. “Don’t Make Me Go Back, Mommy”
“A child’s book about satanic ritual abuse.” Honestly not a sentence I’d ever thought I’d read.
8. “My Mom Has Hepatitis C”
Horrifying. Simply horrifying.
9. “I Wish Daddy Didn’t Drink So Much”
Owning this book is a cry for help.
10. “Good-bye, Testicles”
Might as well wish your innocence good bye while you’re at it.

In the Blue Corner


  • Chelsea have lost just two of their last 17 league and cup games against Tottenham (W8, D7).
  • This will be the first Premier League match played at Wembley Stadium - which will become the 58th different venue to a host game in the competition.
  • Spurs could set a club record of 15 consecutive home league wins on Sunday. The longest winning streak at home in the top flight is Liverpool's run of 21 victories in 1972.
  • Tottenham ended last season unbeaten at home in the league (W17, D2). Their most recent home defeat in the top flight came against Southampton in May 2015, although both Monaco and Bayer Leverkusen won at White Hart Lane in the Champions League last year.
  • Spurs are unbeaten in 13 Premier League London derbies at home under Mauricio Pochettino, winning nine.
  • Since beating Chelsea in the 2008 League Cup final, Spurs have won just one of nine games at Wembley (D2, L6). Their solitary win came against CSKA Moscow in the Champions League.
  • Harry Kane's next goal will be his 100th in all competitions for Tottenham.
  • Kane has failed to score in any of his 11 Premier League appearances in August, but he has 18 goals in his last 21 top-flight matches against London clubs.
  • Christian Eriksen has been directly involved in each of Tottenham's last six goals against Chelsea in all competitions (one goal, five assists).
  • The last time Chelsea lost both of their opening two league games was in 1973 - with one of those defeats coming against Burnley.
  • The last reigning top-flight champions to begin the season with two defeats were Aston Villa in 1981.
  • Since August 2015, the reigning Premier League champions (i.e. Chelsea or Leicester) have lost 31 of 77 top-flight matches, winning just 24 games.
  • Seven of Antonio Conte's eight defeats as Chelsea boss have come in London.
  • Alvaro Morata could become the fourth player to score in his first two Premier League appearances for Chelsea after Adrian Mutu (2003), Deco (2008) and Diego Costa (2014).

Meeting the Colmans

We had arranged to meet D & W in Tito's Square by the fountain and he had jokingly suggested we wear red carnations.  I countered by saying I'd wear a bowler hat, which of course Dave thought I was kidding.

My how we laughed when I did turn up with my hat.

We had a brilliant night out simply sampling some of the local bars and then ending up in a traditional pizzeria on the cobbles.  Unfortunately the weather forecast in Izola which stopped Saturday's Fish Festival also made an appearance in Rovinj and it clattered down at exactly 22:00.  It was just like being back in Bangers with the warm rain flooding the streets.

We didn't care, got soaked and carried on with the beer and conversation.

Round 2 at Bruno's at 17:00 to watch the Spurs/Chelsea match.  One of us (me) is not going to be happy at the result as I can't see us beating Chelsea.  That will make Dave very happy as he is a Blues man.

Golden Goose

Is name of the apartment we are staying in and it's a modern rebuild of a typical Croatian house.  Solid walls, robust and square on the outside, you step in and the decor is modern, minimalist and stylish.

The first thing the young lady, whom we met off the bus, noticed was wifey's walking stick and she was concerned wifey could make it up the steep cobbled streets.  We made it comfortably but on arrival, we were offered the ground floor apartment instead of the fourth floor, which we felt was very kind.

She then said it was their premier room as it had a "view" and it usually cost an extra 20€, but they would waive that.  Erm, the view is of the road and the next door neighbour; we're already paying 110€ per night so if you're trying to get us to pay extra, we'll head on upstairs, thank you very much.

We didn't pay extra and the room is very pleasant, but once again overly small.  And I still can't believe we are paying so much for this- bloody tourist season...

Back on the Buses

We picked up the bus at the post office, which arrived bang on time.  Another added bonus was the cost- we got some coins back from 20€, which is quite impressive seeing as we were travelling into another country and it was going to be around 3 hours.

Thereafter the only hitch was the hour we lost at the border as the queues were horrendous.  August is such a bad time for travelling as everyone has the same idea in Europe.

C & H

Saturday, 19 August 2017

Well Said

The opposite of the religious fanatic is not the fanatical atheist but the gentle cynic who cares not whether there is a god or not.
Eric Hoffer
(1902 - 1983)

Bye-Bye Brucey

Image result for Sir Bruce Forsyth

Very sad to hear Bruce Forsyth has passed away, aged 89.  A true veteran of stage, film and TV, I always had a soft spot for him.  He will be missed.

Davinson Sanchez

Is the first Spurs buy of the new season and traditionally late in the day.  At £42 million he ain't cheap but I trust our scouting team to bring top players to our club.  I hope he doesn't disappoint as plenty of expensive players in the past have...



Some people say that a slight bow is the best way to indicate assent, and I’m inclined to agree.


Orhan did his Uefa manager/agent's training with his friend Amir a few years ago and both are fully qualified to earn a living in the cut and thrust world of professional football.  While Orhan sensibly retired to enjoy life in the Izolian slow lane, Amir used his skills to set up an agency and I just found out he was instrumental in sending a Slovene player to my home town team of Arminia Bielefeld.

What a small world.


“Drag,” in reference to cross-dressing, first appeared in the dictionary in 1870. The term originated in the theatre.  Men wearing elaborate gowns found that long hems tended to drag on the ground, and eventually referred to any character requiring a dress as a “drag” role.

Izola on High

A nice aerial view of Izola that shows its layout and beautiful, working Marina.  A pity it didn't include any camerawork on the deck, walking through some of the cobble stoned streets, but it gives you an idea of where we currently live.


Really sad to see that the Winch Bar has closed since our last visit.  It was always a favourite of mine, set a little way off the regular tourist tramp, slightly up the hill and I was looking forward to spending some time watching the locals play time chess and chain smoke.

It's a real shame and I hope the ex-owners are coping.  đŸ˜Ÿ

On the Buses

No rest for the wicked as the saying goes and having barely spent a couple of nights in Izola we get back on the bus to head down to Rovinj.  This time though we have only hand luggage and a scant three hour coach ride along the Adriatic Sea.

We buy our tickets on the bus itself and I am glad we enquired at the ticket office as they pointed out we have to wait on the opposite side of the bus stop as we are not heading into Koper, our usual direction.  That could have been funny- not.

Coming back is easier as Dave and Wen have a hire car and will drive directly.  They are also staying at the best hotel in town, at the Marina.  It finally gives us a chance to see what it's like inside and grab a beer at the bar.  Should be fun.



Not Just Cricket

Once again the weather is going to foul up the Fish Festival as the severe weather forecast for today has cancelled the event.  Instead it is being rescheduled for tomorrow but alas we will still miss out as we're off to Rovinj to meet up with Dave and Wen on their tour of Croatia.

We'll be back Monday with guys also over-nighting to get first hand experience of just how wonderful Izola is.


The Fish Festival kicked off with its usual flair to thronging crowds enjoying the balmy weather. Live music, fish/seafood stall, beer and wine booths and art/craft sellers cramming into every square centimetre of space.

As we passed the Bariera, who had extended their bar onto the beach promenade, Rok, the owner came bounding out to quite literally pick me off my feet.  I am on the meaty side of 10 stone yet he plucked me up in his enormous bear arms and danced me around the street.

This is how they greet you in Izola, it's a little more affectionate than the English handshake.

Three Times the Charm

I had the misfortune to break a glass cooking pot top that shattered into a million pieces, which belonged to my cousins' set of three.  Mortifying but an example of just how clumsy I have been over the past week.

Yesterday I smashed a Kolsh beer glass that I was hoping to take back to Bangkok as it was a present from Jan and a memento of our day during a street festival in Frankfurt.  Again, more clumsiness which is really unlike me.

I am now waiting for strike three but fortunately don't believe in that mumbo-jumbo...

C & H

Friday, 18 August 2017


Hearty congrats to Malala Yousafzai, the Nobel Prize winning activist who narrowly avoided death after being shot by the Taliban.  She has gained a place to study philosophy, politics and economics at the University of Oxford.

A most impressive feat and yet I wonder.

After some searching, she aced all three of her exams (subjects unknown) with three "A"s, but surely to get into Oxford you need better than that?  A+ results and probably four exams?

Not trying to belittle her remarkable achievements but I wonder if Oxford are playing a PR game here?


Bloody Brilliant

Our eldest nephew just got his AS results back (first year "A" level, I think):  A, A, B & B in maths, further maths, physics, computing.

He sure don't take after me.

Top work fellah, get the finals nailed to the same levels and you'll be joining us in Bangkok next year to celebrate.

Best Bakery

Related image

Whether it's a slice of pizza, a piece of pie or perhaps a section of strudel, the local bakery is simply marvellous at offering all kinds of tempting treats.

But by far is their burek, a filo pastry style pie that can be with cheese, spinach, meat or combinations thereof.  I got a quarter of a dust bin lid sized slice which took two of us to get home and will feed me until the middle of next week.  I opted for their pizza burek, the best of both worlds.

All for 2€...

What a Race

The Austrian round of the MotoGP was on over the weekend but I only got a chance to watch it last night.  Superb racing with plenty of overtaking and balls out riding saw a real nail biting finish which not many would have predicted.

Italy's Andrea Dovizioso held off world champion Marc Marquez to win a thrilling Austrian MotoGP Grand Prix.

World championship leader Marquez had started on pole but Ducati's Dovizioso, 30, got the better of an incredible battle where the lead changed hands several times, including twice on the final corner in Spielberg.

Marquez's Honda team-mate and compatriot Dani Pedrosa came third.

More at the BBC

Austrian MotoGP result:

1. Andrea Dovizioso (Ita/Ducati) 39 mins 43.323 secs
2. Marc Marquez (Spa/Honda) 39:43.499
3. Dani Pedrosa (Spa/Honda) 39:43.499
4. Jorge Lorenzo (Spa/Ducati) 39:49.986
5. Johann Zarco (Fra/Yamaha) 39:50.585
6. Maverick Vinales (Spa/Yamaha) 39:50.770
7. Valentino Rossi (Ita/Yamaha) 39'50.770
8. Alvaro Bautista (Spa/Ducati) 39'57.838
9. Loris Baz (Fra/Ducati) 40'02.943
10. Mika Kallio (Fin/KTM) 40'03.089

Championship standings:

1. Marc Marquez (Spa/Honda) 174 points
2. Andrea Dovizioso (Ita/Ducati) 158
3. Maverick Vinales (Spain/Yamaha) 150
4. Valentino Rossi (Ita/Yamaha) 141
5. Dani Pedrosa (Spa/Honda) 139
6. Johann Zarco (Fra/Yamaha) 99
7. Jorge Lorenzo (Spa/Ducati) 79
8. Jonas Folger (Ger/Yamaha) 77
9. Cal Crutchlow (GB/Honda) 76
10. Danilo Petrucci (Ita/Ducati) 75

News Thump

Wimpy restaurant
There was disappointment in Littlehampton as their Wimpy restaurant on the High Street missed out being named the Good Food Guide restaurant of the year yet again.
There was controversy last year when it emerged that the compilers of the Good Food Guide hadn’t even visited the Littlehampton branch of Wimpy, effectively ruling out of any chance of it being named restaurant of the year with no one even sampling a meal.
Restaurant Nathan Outlaw in Cornwall won the prestigious title.
“Well, look, nothing against Restaurant Nathan Outlaw, I’m sure it does some great food,” said Simon Williams, manager of the Littlehampton branch of Wimpy.
“Although, I understand that it’s a fish restaurant, so that seems a bit limited to me.
“But the fact is, we’re a great little restaurant, you can get a bender in a bun, a brown derby, or you can just get a nice cup of tea and read the Littlehampton Gazette. Tuesday evenings, we’ll do a free Fanta with every meal.
“Now, you can’t tell me that Restaurant Nathan Outlaw can do all that.”
101-year-old Eleanor Gay has been visiting the Wimpy for her breakfast every day since 1979.
“I love it here,” She laughed.
“They do a lovely banana split and don’t charge to refill my tea, it’s restaurant of the year for me for sure.”
Although Mrs Gay received a free plate of chips as she told us this, there is no suggestion that the chips were in exchange for her positive endorsement.
The Good Food Guide refused to answer any queries regarding the Littlehampton branch of Wimpy not being named restaurant of the year.

Well Said

"Wrong" is one of those concepts that depends on witnesses.
Scott AdamsDilbert, 11-05-09
US cartoonist (1957 - )

Good Question

Why are London landlords not capital letters?

Treasure Troves

As with our tradition, we tend to leave a few items (read big bags) at places we visit often.  Cousins J & J have a large case in their basement full of our winter clothes, we have more stuff at my Aunt's in Bielefeld and of course we have mountains of gear here in Izola, with the 02s.

Half the fun of coming back after a lengthy interval is realising just what we have at our disposal and following a fun filled time diving into musty bags, wifey said she could have travelled directly from Bangers to here without packing a single thing; we have it all here already.

T shirts and shorts, flappers and trainers, jackets and hats and all kinds of things we had forgotten about, such as two electric toothbrushes, a laptop (OK, that's well old but the Vaio still chugs along and can be used to watch videos if need be), loud speakers, a shaver, bathroom gear- the list is endless.

Next time we really will travel without gear but when I look at what I did pack, it's almost all full of presents.  There seems to be no getting away from carrying stuff at all.

It Kicks off Already

The famous and ever so popular fish festival starts today but sadly we will miss most of it as we will be in Rovinj, Croatia tomorrow.  We'll make the most of it and I'm glad that I posted this as it's a good reminder for us to buy Kunar today- as tomorrow the banks will be closed.

Bangkok Weather

We haven't had the best run of sunshine along the Rhine but tings were picking up in Frankfurt and it was shorts time again after the first day.  But the precipitation has long been forgotten as we awake every morning to golden globes and temperatures well into the early thirties.  It's almost like being home.  Hang on, we are.  đŸ˜Ž

Match Report

It seems the s-i-l who went up to St James' has not got back to me with details of the game so I had to look it up for myself.  See you next month, Shaz...

Familiarity can so often be wonderfully reassuring but, for Newcastle United, it all too frequently provokes depression. There was to be no exception to this general Geordie rule on Sunday when the sight of Mike Ashley with his arms determinedly folded in the directors’ box simply served as a reminder of how badly the club’s owner has let Rafael BenĂ­tez down in the transfer market this summer.
As if that were not sufficient, a moment of mindless, all too typically self-destructive stupidity from Jonjo Shelvey – namely stepping on Delle Alli’s ankle straight in front of the referee – at the outset of the second half saw BenĂ­tez’s side reduced to 10 men.
Goals from Alli and Ben Davies consequently enabled a visiting team who had hitherto struggled to undo Newcastle’s defensive organisation to rediscover the benefits of what some fear has become an almost stifling familiarity.
After a summer of total transfer market frustration Mauricio Pochettino is desperate to introduce a few new faces ahead of a potential title challenge but, despite playing well within themselves, his existing crew were too good for their newly promoted hosts.
In some ways the first half went reasonably well for Newcastle; Rob Elliot’s goal was barely threatened, Christian Atsu’s pace periodically troubled the young debutant Kyle Walker-Peters, Dwight Gayle looked lively if not exactly subtle and Pochettino’s mounting frustration seemed highlighted when he ordered Moussa Sissoko and Christian Eriksen to swap flanks. Arguably, most reassuringly of all, the Tynesiders defended very well.
Yet there was still plenty to worry BenĂ­tez. Foremost among his concerns must have been Shelvey’s struggles to touch the ball, let alone unleash a penetrative play-making pass but Newcastle’s collective penchant for forfeiting possession far too cheaply can hardly have represented a cause for optimism either.
It did not help that Paul Dummett’s early attempt to intercept Sissoko left the home left-back hamstrung. That injury prompted Jamaal Lascelles’s introduction, with BenĂ­tez’s club captain swiftly proving his worth courtesy of a difficult block to prevent the impressive Mousa DembĂ©lĂ© from driving a shot into the bottom corner.
The substitution interrupted Newcastle’s initially ferocious tempo and, inexorably, Spurs began controlling the pace - and dominating possession. BenĂ­tez’s best hope appeared to rest with getting men behind the ball and thwarting his guests before using the pace of Atsu and Gayle to accelerate behind Pochettino’s high defensive line on the break.
Sure enough one such counter-attack did conclude with Walker-Peters tripping the striker in the area. Had a linesman not flagged for offside against Gayle, it would have been a penalty. No matter; the novice right-back may not quite be the new Kyle Walker but Walker-Peters did sufficient good things to suggest he has an extremely bright future.
The home bench suffered further disappointment when Harry Kane – then rivalling Shelvey in terms of minimal impact on events – was rightly shown a yellow card for catching Florian Lejeune late with an unfortunate tackle from behind which BenĂ­tez thought worthy of a red. The centre-half, newly recruited from Eibar, hobbled off and was replaced by Chancel Mbemba as Newcastle’s defence underwent yet another revamp.
That unit’s enduring efficiency ensured a slightly soporific ending to a first 45 minutes characterised by unusually abundant sunshine, a cacophony of piercing boos greeting St James’ Park old boy Sissoko’s every touch and Ashley’s looming directors’ box presence.
Earlier Sky had released excerpts of a pre-recorded interview with Newcastle’s owner featuring an admission that he had been “naive” in sacking Sam Allardyce and an apology to Chris Hughton for his treatment of the club’s former manager.
If that “sorry” was long overdue, Shelvey owed a very big apology to a lot of people after his idiotic 48th-minute sending off. With Alli prone on the turf after conceding a free-kick and cheekily pushing the ball away from his adversary, the midfielder stood on the England creator’s ankle, directly in front of Andre Marriner.
Decisions are rarely more straightforward and the referee wasted no time in reaching for his red card. With Lascelles beginning on the bench, BenĂ­tez had made Shelvey captain for the afternoon but, now, the Spaniard deliberately looked away as he trudged off.
Newcastle’s 10 men soon fell behind. Like Kane, Alli had endured an uncharacteristically ineffective start but he issued a belated reminder of his talent by registering that opening goal.
It arrived at the end of a hallmark Spurs passing move, concluding with Kane picking out Eriksen whose cross was met by Alli’s left foot and a stretching finish far too good for Elliot after the scorer had darted between Lascelles and Mbemba.
If Alli’s run had been timed to perfection so, too, was Ben Davies’s dash into the box as Pochettino’s left-back, claimed the second goal with a low, six-yard shot following slick first-time passes, from Kane and Alli and the increasingly excellent Eriksen’s deception of the home defence by shaping to shoot himself.
Anxious not to be eclipsed, Kane then hit a post before seeing a ’goal’ disallowed for offside. His moment will come - but Newcastle’s horizon looks ominously clouded.